Monday, January 31, 2011

Month 12

Miss Ruby,
I have thought so much about this post, and so much about you the last couple of days; remembering what life was like before you became a part of it. It's hard to remember what our days were like without you in them. Before you were born I wondered and fretted about how I would be a mother to two little girls. How would I have two children, and what would it be like to love them both so much. From the moment you arrived I never thought twice about it. One day you will understand the amount of love that came pouring out of my soul when you arrived. You have been a constant happy peaceful spot in my life the last 12 months.
 You have everyone wrapped around your fingers, and everyone feels like you are their favorite. But you have your favorites. Some days I am one of them, some days I am not. Most days it's Stella, but nobody has a chance when your Grandpa Trace walks in. You only have eyes for him. We went to see Loop a few weeks ago and when he walked in the door from work with an arm full of stuff you patiently waiting at his leg until he realized that you weren't going anywhere until he picked you up. You spent the evening just playing with him, smiling, clapping and bringing him toys. It warms my heart to see you love your grandpa, to have eyes for him like I do.
You are still very small little one, but your eyes still sparkle big and blue. Your hair is getting longer and gets fluffy when you get out of the tub. You can walk now but are hesitant to do so because you are so much faster on your knees. Any day I'm sure you will be running around non stop. You jabber on and on to Stella and Kevin, mostly saying "dadadadadadada" throwing in an occasional "mama". When you are done eating you shake your head "no" at me and start to throw the food around. You eat like you are starving all the time, and eat anything you can get your hands on. It makes for interesting dinners.
Ruby, you have constantly been everything I've needed this last year. From the moment they laid you on my chest and the entire world disappeared you have been everything I need. Whatever situation I was in, or emotion I was going through you always seemed to carry me through. Your sweetness has carried me through the roller coaster months, and your constant happiness has set the tone as we've settled into our new life. You were born and shortly after my heart was broken, but it didn't hurt as much because you filled that void. Thank you. Thank you for being my baby girl, for being my Ruby Red Dress. Thank you for taking care of me in ways nobody else could have.
I am so excited to see what the next months bring as we just enjoy the day to day!

I love you Ruby Maine.

love love

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