Tuesday, April 24, 2012

The How To...

***Dad, this is a post where I whine a little bit about being pregnant and sick all the time, and as I'm typing this I'm a little "hang dog-ish". You don't have to read it.***

Some women don't throw up while pregnant or even get nauseated, some women don't gain a hundred pounds at exactly week 17 like me, some women can summon all their energy and be productive the first months, some women say they enjoy pregnancy, ( I believe them to be liars). But some women have terrible deliveries or get itchy rashes everywhere. Some women get bad veins in their legs or a belly button that is an over achiever. Or worse some women can't have babies.  As I lay in bed and wait for the nausea to pass so I can get on with things, I think I've got a system figured out of how to get through the worst of it. (I'm mind over mattering this whole puke until there is nothing left to puke thing, I'm pretending that it's working.)
Here is my list of how you get through the worst trimester in case you are entertaining the idea of a miserable 3 months...
  • You will need a text message every morning from your mother that says "Dead or Alive?" That way you have to actually choose if you are going to be dead or alive that day. Some day's I choose to be dead. 
  • You will need an entire TV series on DVD to pass the time. I'm currently listening to The Gilmore Girls. I say listening because half the time I'm in and out of sleep.
  • Diet Coke. I went 3 days without it and I've never been so grumpy or sick. Today I sipped on one over ice and I immediately felt better.
  • Little girls to snuggle with. Ruby lets me play with her hair while she lays her head on my chest and tells me about her day.
  • You will need a husband that checks on you every 5 minutes to make sure you are still OK. Also that husband will have to be very good with the snuggly little girls because they will like him a lot more than you. 
  • Toast. I eat a lot of toast and it seems to help. 
  • You will need a little brothers wardrobe so you can comfortably wear baggy t-shirts to hide the fact that you aren't wearing a bra. 
  • Good Nurses. The kind that even when they use your arm like a pin cushion day after day you still like them and are happy they came by. Mostly because it forced you to take a shower.
  • Mouthwash. It kills the taste of pregnancy.
  • You will need to hear the heart beat of the gummy bear inside. So you know there is a reason why your body became all squishy. 
  • You will need a necessary reason to leave the house and look pulled together. Jr. Promenade with the entire town is definitely a reason to brush your teeth and wash your hair.
  • A good day. Just when you think you can't handle it anymore, there is no way you can puke anymore or harness the nausea for much longer you get a good day. It might just be a good afternoon or a good morning. But it reminds you that there is an end and that it will end, you will go on to feeling better at some point. 
  • More than anything I need that husband of mine. I'm really lucky that I have him. He brings home dinner and it always happens to be something that sounds good. He let's me sleep in and takes care of the girls whole heartily. He does the laundry and calls to check on me through out the day. He sits on the other side of the bathroom door because he knows I would rather puke privately than have him hold my hair. He gives me space when the thought of being snuggled or held is insanity; even though that's all he wants to do. He gets me. He loves me.
That's how I get through the days of blur. Some days are better and some days I wish to forget. But they will go away, sooner than later I am certain. We are on the downhill just creeping are way to the weeks when everything feels better and normal. Like I said, we are mind over matter this one and just praying that it works eventually.

love love


  1. Hi! I'm not sure if you saw my earlier comment, where I explain how we are cousins, but anyway...
    So excited for you and Kevin! But also sympathetic to your plight, morning sickness is rough. My twin pregnancy was the worst, I don't know how I would have made it through without zofran, crackers, sprite, and Brigg bringing home dinner for months so I wouldn't have to make it.
    I hope you feel better soon, and again, I love reading your blog.

  2. love it love it.
    And the ONLY reason I can say I liked pregnancy (despite my 100 lb weight gain and total loss of fitness level and the fact that I was doing it while caring for a newborn baby...) is because I never thought I'd be preg. otherwise I agree- most women are liars.
    hang in there. you're doing fab. and I hardly shower anymore anyway. Cheers to the stinky mom club :)

  3. wait what!!!???? Where the hell have I been??? Missing from your life OBVIOUSLY! I didn't even know you were pregnant! Congrats to you and Kevin!