lucky me

The sun is finally shining here. It's the 6th of May and the sun is finally peeking out giving off warmth. It couldn't have come at a better time. I adore the spring time, watching the tulips pop up and feeling energized to actually clean out that junk drawer. Last night as we arrived home from work the sun was warming the grass so the girls ran around and chased bugs and picked dandelions. It was a beautiful moment. A moment where there was sunshine on my face, Ruby was on my lap showing me where her nose was and Stella was literally rolling in the grass. The girls went with their dad shortly after that moment and as I sat on the front porch waiting for my Tall Friend to finish his work day, I missed them. I always miss them, I always wish they were there with me, I always wonder what they are doing and if they are having fun. I know they are having a good time, Stella tells me all about it. But still. Sometimes I wish they could be slightly out of control and exhausting right before they go to spend the weekend with short dad, then I would be ready for a break. That rarely happens. They always say the cutest things, and snuggle right before they leave. I guess it's always best to part on a happy note. As mother's day approaches, a holiday I usually hate, I couldn't help but be so grateful to be their mom. To have not 1 healthy beautiful little girl, but to have 2. How lucky am I? Don't get me wrong, Stella is a full blown three year old who screams to hear herself make noise and doesn't do anything efficiently or quickly. And Ruby has begun the stage of communication by hitting and scratching along with yelling. But yet they are mine. They come running to me when they found a potato bug or when they fall down. They come over with blankets in hand looking to snuggle in the early morning hours. They tell me about their day and ask to make cookies. And when they leave every other weekend, Stella is sure to tell me that she will always come back to me. Always.

 Those are the moments of motherhood, whatever the circumstance or child, that make anyone think they could have 4 more.

Gratefully those moments don't last long.